going LOCAL
Funny Saturday!
Posted:Jul 21, 2018 9:30 am
Last Updated:Jul 21, 2018 10:48 am
117 Views



Funny Saturday!


Did you ever get sick during sex?



So this guy meets a girl at the bar and after a few drinks they go back to her place. Going hot and heavy at it he goes down on her. While he's eating her out a kernel of corn comes out. He finds it odd but keeps going. Then a piece of carrot comes out and he thinks to himself, "wow this chick is in to kink!" But bits of food keep coming out of her snatch when finally a chunk of potato comes out and he freaks out looking up and says, "Damn baby, you sick?" She looks down and says, "No the guy before you was."


A little mouth wash!


Funny Saturday!
5 Comments
Hotel California!
Posted:Jul 21, 2018 9:10 am
Last Updated:Jul 21, 2018 12:50 pm
132 Views



The Eagles!


When was the last time you checked into a Hotel to just have sex?



Hotel California
Eagles
On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night.
There she stood in the doorway;
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself
'This could be heaven or this could be Hell'
Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say
Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face.
Plenty of room at the Hotel California
Any time of year (any time of year) you can find it here
Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes bends
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget
So I called up the Captain,
'Please bring me my wine'
He said, 'we haven't had that spirit here since nineteen sixty-nine'
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say"
Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face.
They livin' it up at the Hotel California
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise), bring your alibis
Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink champagne on ice
And she said, 'we are all just prisoners here, of our own device'
And in the master's chambers,
They gathered for the feast
They stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can't kill the beast
Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
'Relax' said the night man,
'We are programmed to receive.
You can check out any time you like,
But you can never leave!'


Was it a good experience?


The Eagles!
6 Comments
Let The Good Times Roll!
Posted:Jul 21, 2018 9:01 am
Last Updated:Jul 21, 2018 10:39 am
125 Views



The Cars!


When was the last time you went on a road trip?



Let the good times roll
Let them knock you around
Let the good times roll
Let them make you a clown
Let them leave you up in the air
Let them brush your rock and roll hair
Let the good times roll
Let the good times roll
Let the good times roll
Let the stories be told
They can say what they want
Let the photos be old
Let them show what they want
Let them leave you up in the air
Let them brush your rock and roll hair
Let the good times roll
Let the good times roll-oll
Won't you let the good times roll
Good times roll
If the illusion is real
Let them give you a ride
If they got thunder appeal
Let them be on your side
Let them leave you up in the air
Let them brush your rock and roll hair
Let the good times roll
Won't you let the good times roll-oll
Let theā€¦


Did you do it in the car?


The Cars!
3 Comments
Gone Fishing. . . Fishnet Friday!
Posted:Jul 20, 2018 6:32 am
Last Updated:Jul 20, 2018 6:46 am
305 Views



Gone Fishing. . . Fishnet Friday!












Gone Fishing. . . Fishnet Friday!
7 Comments
Funny Thursday!
Posted:Jul 19, 2018 7:49 am
Last Updated:Jul 19, 2018 8:19 am
366 Views



Funny Thursday!


If you think your life is bad, how would you like to be an egg? You get laid once in life, you only get eaten once in life, It takes 4 min to get hard, but only 2 min. to get soft, you share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all the only chick who ever sat on your face was your mother. Pass this to someone who needs a good lay, sorry I mean day.



A little boy walks into a whore house with a $100 bill and a dead frog. He goes to the pimp and asks for the ho with the most venerial diseases. The pimp is surprised but gives the boy his ho. After the boy does his deed, the pimp asks why he wanted the ho with all the venerial diseases. The boy answers: When I go home, I will get a babysitter while my parents go out to eat and I'll fuck her. When my parents get home, my dad will drive the sitter home and screw her in the car. Tonight, my parents will fuck. Tomorrow, after my dad leaves for work, my mom will do the mailman, AND THAT THE SON Of A BITCH IS THE GUY WHO RAN OVER MY FROG !!!!!


A woman enrolled in nursing school is attending an anatomy class. The subject of the day is involuntary muscles. The instructor, hoping to perk up the students a bit, asks the woman if she knows what her asshole does during an orgasm. "Sure!" she says, "He's at home taking care of the kids..."


Funny Thursday!
7 Comments
Happy Hump Day Wednesday!
Posted:Jul 18, 2018 5:27 pm
Last Updated:Jul 18, 2018 5:40 pm
420 Views



Happy Hump Day Wednesday!


I hope we all made again to the middle of the week and therefore it is all down hill until Friday and the weekend!



Have you been humped, Yes, No, or, at least your thinking about it?


Hot dogie is my favorite hump day sex position!
What is your favorite sex position?


Happy Hump Day Wednesday!
6 Comments
Tickling your funny bone!
Posted:Jul 17, 2018 9:05 am
Last Updated:Jul 17, 2018 3:22 pm
566 Views



Tickling your funny bone!






Love Handles:
Monica Lewinsky was walking on the beach when she found a lantern washed up on the shore. She started to rub it and out popped a genie. "Oh goodie, now I will get three wishes!" she exclaimed. "No," said the genie, "You have been very bad this year, and because of this, I can only give you one wish." "Let's see," says Monica, "I don't need fame, because I have plenty of that due to all of the media coverage. And I don't need money, because after I write my book, and do all my interviews, I'll have all the money I could ever want. I would like to get rid of these love handles, though. Yes, that's it, for my one wish, I would like my love handles removed." Poof! And just like that...... her ears were gone.





Tickling your funny bone!
10 Comments
Cold or Hot Shower Tuesday!
Posted:Jul 17, 2018 7:55 am
Last Updated:Jul 17, 2018 4:22 pm
574 Views



Cold or Hot Shower Tuesday!


Who washes your tits?



Who washes your butt?


Do you love to have sex in the shower?


Cold or Hot Shower Tuesday!
6 Comments
To show or not to show your tits on Titty Tuesday!
Posted:Jul 17, 2018 7:53 am
Last Updated:Jul 17, 2018 9:50 am
550 Views



To show or not to show your tits on Titty Tuesday!


No show?



Q: What did one saggy tit say to the other saggy tit?
A: If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts!


To show or not to show that is the question!


To show or not to show your tits on Titty Tuesday!
5 Comments
Wishing for Tuesday!
Posted:Jul 16, 2018 9:22 am
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2018 10:07 am
645 Views



Wishing for Tuesday!


I can not wait until Tuesday cums!



Tuesday's are always deeper!


I can not wait!


Wishing for Tuesday!
4 Comments
It is hard on a Monday!
Posted:Jul 16, 2018 9:13 am
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2018 10:22 am
633 Views



It is hard on a Monday!


Apparently it is dry!



Ok, you can tease me until Tuesday!


It is cold too on Mondays but your heat will melt away all my worries and frustrations!



2 Comments
Only on a Monday funnies!
Posted:Jul 16, 2018 8:48 am
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2018 10:21 am
666 Views



Only on a Monday funnies!


This guy got a hell of a blow job this Monday!



Well, It is a Monday one needs whatever help one can get just to get through the day!


And women worry about pantie lines!


Only on a Monday funnies!
4 Comments
Funny Sunday!
Posted:Jul 15, 2018 6:09 am
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2018 10:26 am
767 Views



They got my name wrong in the UK. The girls kept calling me "Little Ben"!






If I only had a dollar!





Getting my carry on through customs at the UK airport and SFO was a bitch!
8 Comments

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Most Recent Comments by Others

Post Poster Post Date
Let The Good Times Roll! (5)alohashirt50
Jul 21, 2018 12:02 pm
Hotel California! (6)Tmptrzz
Jul 21, 2018 10:12 am
Funny Saturday! (5)Tmptrzz
Jul 21, 2018 10:12 am
Gone Fishing. . . Fishnet Friday! (7)Tmptrzz
Jul 20, 2018 4:25 pm
Funny Thursday! (7)author51
Jul 20, 2018 2:11 am
To show or not to show your tits on Titty Tuesday! (5)vopesahe
Jul 19, 2018 11:59 am
Cold or Hot Shower Tuesday! (7)vopesahe
Jul 19, 2018 11:54 am
Tickling your funny bone! (10)vopesahe
Jul 19, 2018 11:50 am
Happy Hump Day Wednesday! (6)vopesahe
Jul 19, 2018 11:46 am
Wishing for Tuesday! (4)author51
Jul 16, 2018 9:45 am
Only on a Monday funnies! (4)Tmptrzz
Jul 16, 2018 8:55 am